Side Effects Including
by Luna Darkside
Summary: ...insanity, mental instability, lunacy, and amnesia, to name a few. /ShinKai, [faily] oneshot/


_This is actually very, very rushed. I'm so so sorry. Full A/N bottom. - Luna_**  
**

**Side Effects Including**

"I'm sure I'll be fine." The six-year-old (in body only) glared, arms crossed in a pose of defiance, at the white-clad thief standing across the rooftop. "I don't need your concern, Kid."

"You have no way of insuring your safety, tantei-kun!" Kaitou Kid argued, a shard of anger mixed with worry breaking through his Poker Face. "There's only a fifty percent chance you'll survive the antidote!"

"Where did you hear that?" Edogawa Conan replied coolly, though Kid noticed the tightening of the boy's fingers on his upper arms.

"Don't think I'm helpless, Kudou. I'm not going to let you take a life-or-death gamble just to return to your former body," the gentleman thief growled. "You're worth more to me than that."

Surprise wrote itself over Conan's face for a millisecond before erasing itself. "A nice sentiment, but I refuse to allow you of all people to stop me from obtaining my real body. If you didn't know, there's somebody waiting for Kudou Shinichi, and I will not keep them waiting any longer."

The thief swallowed. "So it's for Ran? You'd take a fifty-fifty chance of life or death just to be with her as Kudou Shinichi?"

Conan shrugged indifferently. "Believe what you will."

There was a cold silence, suffused with near-palpable tension. A knife-like wind began slicing at the two, but both ignored it in favor of their silent stare contest.

Finally the silence broke.

"Please."

It was only one word, but Conan could hear the note of anxiety, the concern, the _desperation_ that broke the word in half. For the first time, Kid stood without masks, begging Conan to reconsider, no longer the untouchable phantom thief, just a lost, broken man with a lost, broken wish.

This is the exact reason why I have to take the antidote, Conan thought.

"No." Conan glared icily at him. "I refuse."

And Kid was forced to watch as the six-year-old turned on his heel, opened the door to the passage into the building, tossed a last, "See you, Kid," over his shoulder, and walked away.

* * *

**Two Weeks Later**

It was late in the afternoon, and the sun was setting, painting the sky a beautiful orange. Kaito crouched by Professor Agasa's window, peering into the house with a strangled expression on his face. It was unfortunate that he hadn't managed to bug the house earlier that day, but he'd been held up by Aoko and had only gotten to the house a few minutes earlier.

It was just his luck that he had arrived just in time to witness the first-ever couple fight of the newly returned Kudou Shinichi and the fair Mouri Ran.

Shinichi was staring blankly at the karate champion, eyebrows reaching for each other slowly as Ran motioned at him animatedly, sparkling tears drifting down her pink cheeks.

The scene also contained a tanned Osakan boy, recognizably the western detective Hattori Heiji, sitting at Professor Agasa's kitchen table, observing the scene wearing an expression mangled with bewilderment and alarm. There was also that mad scientist girl – Haibara Ai, was it? – with the short auburn hair, who watched them fighting with an apathetically cold look to her eyes. Kaito easily saw through the frosty sheen and spotted the carefully-concealed panic.

He wasn't exactly sure why both of the onlookers seemed so worried, but Kaito did know that he was admittedly quite ecstatic to see the detective.

When Kaito had heard that the antidote had only a fifty percent chance of survival, he had been adamantly against it. He didn't care if he never got to hold Shinichi, to kiss him, to even just _see _him, he didn't care what he had to give up. All he had known was that he didn't want to even _think _of Conan/Shinichi dying.

And that was when Kaito realized he had it, had it _bad_, for Kudou Shinichi.

It had then dawned on him that despite that he was ridiculously in love with Shinichi/Conan, there wasn't, couldn't be, any kind of non-platonic relation between them. First of all, both of them were male, and second, there was a ten year age gap between him and Conan, at least in body, that was impossible to fill.

There was also the small fact that Shinichi/Conan didn't know him as Kaito, only as Kid, which only furthered the complications. Oh, and did he mention that the chances of Shinichi/Conan actually returning his feelings were slim to none?

But now, Kaito was (guiltily) glad that Conan had taken and survived the antidote. He couldn't help it. There was still the same gender issue, but at least the ten year age gap had closed. He could introduce himself as Kaito. Maybe, just maybe, Shinichi could fall for Kuroba Kaito in return.

In other words, Kaito now had a chance with Kudou Shinichi, and he was indisputably, inordinately, and grudgingly happy that the detective had taken the antidote.

Kaito continued watching as Hattori finally intervened, pulling Ran off of Shinichi and gripping his fellow detective's shoulders as he spoke sternly to him. Shinichi blinked at him and replied with something apparently shocking, because Heiji, Ran, and Haibara all flinched, eyes widening in almost comical unison.

"Wonder what he said?" Kaito murmured to himself, an eyebrow slowly climbing towards his hairline as he looked down into his lap, contemplating the possibilities.

_Maybe he said he doesn't love Ran? _His heart jumped for a second. _No, that's stupid. He _said _he was coming back because someone was waiting for him, and it's clearly Ran. Do I even have a chance with him?_

Suddenly, startlingly, Kaito was aware of a gaze on him. He cringed and looked up, finding himself face to face with Hattori Heiji.

_Dammit._

Before Kaito could move, the tanned detective ripped open the window, causing the track to squeal in protest, hoisted Kaito through by the front of his shirt, and slammed the window shut, still gripping Kaito's shirt.

"Who the hell are you?" he shouted in Kansai-ben-warped Japanese.

Stuttering, Kaito only managed to get out, "Uh – I –"

"Who is it?"

Both Hattori and Kaito froze at the sound of Shinichi's voice. To Kaito, it sounded perfect and just like he'd always dreamed, though a little dazed, which was surprising.

"It's just, uh, some weird guy who looks like you," Hattori responded, his words abruptly becoming uneasy and stilted. Kaito felt a spark of confusion at the change.

"He looks like me?" The voice was getting closer, and Kaito felt a shiver of apprehension crawl down his spine. He started to panic slightly. Could he face Shinichi? Now?

"Yeah," Hattori tossed out, moving to try to obscure something, either Shinichi's view of Kaito or Kaito's view of Shinichi.

"C'mon, it can't hurt if I just _look _at him," reprimanded Shinichi's voice half-jokingly.

Hattori swallowed. "Kudou..." But he let Shinichi gently push him to the side.

Kaito's breath caught at first sight of the detective. He was wearing clothes that were slightly too small, easily outlining and highlighting his muscles, and his eyes were bluer than Kaito had ever realized. It was disconcerting, the effect those eyes had on him.

Once he started breathing again, he realized that the disconcerting eyes were widened, staring, stunned, at him.

"You..."

_Wait, don't tell me... he's realized that I'm Kid?!_

"You're..."

Kaito closed his eyes. _Goodbye, life of freedom._

"You're... You're somebody important. To me."

"What?" Kaito's eyes snapped open, going ruby red.

Shinichi half-smiled, completely straight-faced.

"I don't know who you are, or how I know you, or what your name is, but I _do_ know that you are indescribably, undeniably important to me."

Ran, Heiji, and Haibara were staring openmouthed at Shinichi, Ran especially.

"Kudou!" Hattori yelped, face reddening as he pulled Shinichi away from Kaito by the shoulder. "What the hell are you _saying_?"

"I'd like you to stop calling me Kudou and acting like you know me," Shinichi sighed, quite rudely pulling Hattori's hand off him. He strolled away calmly, sitting down on the professor's couch.

"Kudou, I swear to God that I know you... you just... can't remember..." Hattori said, trailing after the other detective but stopping behind Shinichi, staring, almost hurt, at his back.

Ran began crying again, swiping at the tears with the sleeve of her sweater. Haibara looked away, hands clenching almost unnoticeably at her lab-coat clad sides.

"What's going on?" Kaito asked, feeling disturbed and lost and intrusive.

Hattori sighed heavily before turning to meet his gaze. "The antidote worked, as you can see. Kudou's clearly alive and in his real body. But for some reason, he'd lost all his memories."

Someone gasped, and it took Kaito a second to realize it was him. "He's an amnesiac?"

"Yeah." Hattori shrugged and rubbed the back of his head. "But he, er, seems to remember you."

"He doesn't remember you? Mouri-chan? Haibara-san?" Kaito stammered in disbelief, gaze flickering from Hattori's resigned green eyes to Shinichi's back, then back again.

Hattori shot him a warning look. "How do you know us?"

"I'm a... an acquaintance of Shinichi. My name's Kuroba Kaito." So does he or doesn't he?"

"An _acquaintance_? That's _important _to him?" An eyebrow slipping up behind his fringe, Hattori turned to stare at Kaito.

"Look, I had no idea about... that," Kaito denied, face going pink. "Answer the question."

Turning back away, Hattori answered, "No, he doesn't remember us. That's why the neechan's freaking out so much. She's been waiting for him since forever." Hattori angled another look at Kaito. "Are you sure you're just an _acquaintance_, Kuroba? I mean, he's never – I mean, he never mentioned you, so I guess you aren't a close friend, but if you're somebody important to him... makes me think he _should _have mentioned you at least once."

Hesitating, Kaito countered, "Yes. I've only talked to him on occasion."

"Damn that Kudou, remembering an _acquaintance _and not his girlfriend or his best friend." Hattori groaned. "It's just like him."

The words _girlfriend _and _it's just like him _hit Kaito like a bullet. He may be important, but Shinichi had taken the cure, had come back for Ran, not him. For God's sake, Shinichi didn't even _know _Kuroba Kaito.

And that was the other problem. Shinichi didn't even _know _Kuroba Kaito. And Kuroba Kaito realized that _he _didn't know _Shinichi. _

Their interactions had always been limited to rooftop heist banter. They'd never talked about anything normal. They were rivals. He was a criminal, Shinichi was a detective.

It was alarming to think that Kaito didn't even _know _the person he loved most in the world. Kaito didn't know what Shinichi's favorite color was, what his worst subject in school was, his height, his favorite food, the brand of toothpaste he used.

Hell, Kaito didn't even know Shinichi's _birthday_.

It was a very depressing thought.

"I'm still here, you know. Please stop talking like I'm not," Shinichi remarked, turning slightly and breaking Kaito from his very depressing thoughts. "And Hattori-san, please realize that Mouri-san is not my girlfriend. I have no memory of her."

"Uh, that makes sense, since you have amnesia. But you could be a little nicer about it," said Hattori, tacking on the last sentence as Ran's silent sobs escalated into near-wails.

"A million apologies for being honest."

"Sometimes it's nicer to lie, you know?" Hattori exhaled.

"That's rather dishonest."

"Well, if she isn't your girlfriend, you led her on for an awfully long time. I'd consider that pretty damn dishonest, Kudou."

Shinichi was quiet. Finally he answered softly, "I won't deny that I may have made some mistakes."

For a second both Kaito and Hattori were startled into silence, exchanging looks. Shinichi had never been the type to admit he had been wrong, even Kaito knew _that_.

There was a sudden movement, and Shinichi stood up. "I'd like to do something beneficial. Something other than sitting around."

The dark-skinned detective blinked, then brightened. "Sure. The neechan and I can take you around town while Haibara-chan works on another antido –"

"No." Shinichi's voice was firm. "I don't remember either of you, so why would I want to go places with you? You'd just try to convince me that you're my best friend and Mouri-san's my girlfriend." Hattori opened his mouth to protest angrily, but Shinichi cut in, pivoting to scrutinize a suddenly pink Kaito.

After a moment of calm studying, he asked, "Would you mind showing me around, Kaito?"

Kaito's flush intensified, mouth opening and closing. _What? _"Uh, sure, if you really want me to..."

"Thank you."

And Ran, Hattori, Haibara, and Kaito all watched in awe as the first real smile broke over Shinichi's face.

* * *

"So... where do you want to, er, go first?"

Kaito and Shinichi were walking in a silence, standing outside of the professor's house. Shinichi was glancing curiously around, and Kaito was willing away his blush.

Shinichi smirked. "Well, I don't really know any places in this area, since I have no idea where we are."

"Oh, that's right." _Kaito, you _idiot_!_

"Who's that?"

Kaito stopped mentally committing suicide to look where Shinichi was pointing. A tattered newspaper had floated towards them by way of the morning's breeze, and Shinichi was staring curiously at the black and white picture of Kid printed on it.

"Him? He's the Kaitou Kid," Kaito answered.

"What does he do?"

"He's a... thief. He steals jewels."

Wrinkling his nose with distaste, Shinichi shrugged. "Doesn't sound like a very good person to feature on a newspaper."

Feeling his heart move south, Kaito quickly defended, "He always returns the jewels that he steals, and his heists always have a nobody-gets-hurt policy. And he's probably got a really good reason for stealing."

"You seem quite vocal on his virtue," Shinichi commented. There was a glint in his eyes as he inspected the paper. "You know, you look quite a bit like him. Same build, same eyes, same hair."

"The same could be said of you!" Kaito insisted, a little too quickly.

Shinichi examined him, one eyebrow raised. "Actually, I think I'm slightly too tall to be him."

"C'mon, let's go," faltered Kaito in an attempt to change topics.

"No, no, wait. I feel some kind of... connection to this Kid person. Do you know if I've ever met him?"

_Yes, I'm pretty sure you have, as I'm Kid and I'm in love with you. Usually people don't fall in love with people they've never met. _"I think maybe once, at this... uh... clock tower."

"Well, you want to take me there?"

"Um, sure."

* * *

The two of them stood on the clock tower, the chilly night wind blowing through their hair and nipping at their clothes.

It was all too familiar, standing on a rooftop with Shinichi at nighttime with the sky a stretch of midnight blue silk studded with diamond stars and a single pearl moon.

"Kaito..."

Kaito started. "Um, y-yes?"

"You're Kid, aren't you?"

Kaito felt his stomach drop, but he kept a straight face. _Do _not _look at Shinichi. Do _not. "No."

He heard the amnesiac detective sigh. "That's too bad. I just realized that I'm in love with Kid."

A jolt went through Kaito, and he whirled to stare at Shinichi –

– and suddenly there were a pair of lips pressing against his, warm and comfortable. Kaito jerked, almost reeling back in shock, but a hand came out of nowhere and gently braced his head in place. An arm snaked around his waist and pulled him in, holding him against Shinichi, Kaito's hands dangling uselessly at his sides.

_What the hell...?!_

A moment passed, and finally Shinichi slackened his grasp, allowing Kaito to pull back, light-headed.

"So, are you Kid?" Shinichi asked, a twinkle in his eye and a smile on his lips.

"How the hell am I supposed to lie after you do something like _that_?" Kaito exclaimed, fingertips pressed to his lips and a blush stuck to his cheeks.

"You're not supposed to lie." Shinichi leaned in, his breath ghosting over Kaito's rapidly heating face.

"...Yes, I'm Kid," Kaito whispered, trying to look away, but being forced to stare into Shinichi's eyes due to the hand still cradling his head.

"One more question."

"Yeah?"

"Do you love me?"

Kaito turned even redder. "Yes."

Shinichi grinned ear-to-ear. "Is that so." And he leaned down and kissed Kaito once more.

The two broke apart (eventually), Kaito flustered and Shinichi still wearing a grin. He pulled out a cell phone and flipped it open.

"Hey, Hattori? The plan worked. I got him to confess. Yeah, that he was Kid. And, okay, that he loves me. Stop laughing, you idiot."

_Huh? _

"Uh-huh. Tell Ran thanks. Haibara too. Oh, and Nakamori-san as well. Say hi to Kazuha for me. See you later." Shinichi finished and flicked the phone shut, tucking it back into the recesses of his pocket.

"What...? Confess? Plan? Don't you have amnesia?" Kaito was at a loss.

"Sorry about all that, Kaito. I guess I have to admit that it was a ploy."

"A _ploy_?"

"A 'test of love,' if you will. I told Hattori that I was in love with Kid, and he and I came up with this idea. First was to make you think there was only a fifty percent chance of survival for the antidote to see if you cared if I could possibly die. You passed that test at your last heist when you tried to dissuade me from taking the cure."

Kaito was left blinking as Shinichi continued.

"Second was to get Nakamori-san to keep you from putting bugs in Professor Agasa's house while I took the antidote and we set the stage for our performance. Ran was in on it – she was mad that I didn't tell her about Conan for a little, but she ended up okay with it and helped Hattori and me with the plan. She's dating Hondou Eisuke, if you care to know.

"Then I was supposed to act all idiotic and cold and amnesiac and then get you in a position where you'd confess to being Kid and being in love with me." Shinichi slanted a grin at him. "You passed the test, by the way, when you showed up at the professor's house and when you agreed to take me out. Flying colors."

Kaito was still gaping. "You didn't... it was...?"

"Yeah." Shinichi smiled warmly. "It was all a hoax, Kaito. I never forgot anything."

There was a quiet silence.

"You do realize you could've just asked me out like a normal human being."

"I didn't know if you'd 'go out' with me unless you pitied me for being amnesiac!"

Kaito gave him a flat stare.

"And okay, fine, this was more fun."

"Not for me."

Shinichi grinned, leaning in. "I can make it more..._ fun_, if that's what you want."

Kaito smirked, ignoring the heat pooling in his cheeks. "I wouldn't have anything against that, I suppose."

* * *

**Hmm. I seem to be ending with sexual innuendos quite often.**

**I would like to apologize for this. It makes absolutely no sense. Hopefully someone will find it amusing, because I sure as hell don't. Seriously, I don't even _know _why Shinichi would ever do anything like this. It's so ridiculously OOC that I don't even know. And pointless. Why would he need to fake amnesia in order to...? I don't even knooooooooow.**

**Ironically, this was written because I decided I haven't been writing anything good, and then I wrote it and it turned out horrible, because I wanted to finish it as soon as possible since I have school tomorrow and I know for a fact that I'm going to have a very rough week. Which would mean this wouldn't get finished for a long time. I think I'll probably delete this story, though, because I honestly despise it.**

**Wow, depressing. Anyhow, see ya and I pray to God that you found this at least slightly interesting. I won't hate you if you flame and say it sucks. I'll just go cry in the corner and delete the story.**

**Even more depressing. I'm just going to go. See you later, hopefully.**

**Note about that project (mentioned in _Luna's Drabbles_): Possible completion. We're looking at maybe a month if we're lucky.**

**- Luna**


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